Falling into Fall


Fall is my favorite season.  Maybe it is because I have red hair and people with red hair seem to gravitate towards all things fall.  Maybe it’s because I love all the beautiful colors (burnt orange, UT fans?).  Maybe it’s because I love college football, pumpkins, crisp apples, apple cider, and walks in the fresh air.  Then again, maybe I love it because I can snuggle up with a throw in front of the fire, a good book and cup of jasmine tea in hand.  Whatever the reason, it is a gorgeous time of the year in the Northwest.  There are such vivid colors that sometimes you can’t take it all in.  From yellows to oranges to reds—and most often these colors stand out against a gray sky.  It’s as if Mother Nature knew we needed the bright colors to get us through the rainy season.
Fall is the perfect time for some introspection, at least for me.  I’ve learned that I am very sentimental and often hang onto things I shouldn’t—that includes material objects as well as emotions, hurts and resentments.  Not so long ago I went through a very painful time.  It affected me in every way and I felt a great deal of sadness and guilt.  My reasoning mind knows I need to let go of those feelings—they don’t serve me well.  But knowing and doing are two different things.
One day when I was thinking about that painful time in my life, I had a vision of me as a tall tree.  And I was shedding leaves, leaves that didn’t serve me well, things that only hurt me and didn’t help me grow as a person.  Shedding those things help me—they  make way for new things like the future—just as a tree shedding its leaves makes way for new life, new leaves. 
I realized that I need to be like that tree and let those leaves of the past go.  I need to remind myself to do that instead of mucking around in the past from time to time.  Those days are gone.  These days are what matter.  What I have now is most precious and I don’t need to waste a minute of my time left on this earth being sad or feeling guilty over something I have no control over. 
Do you ever find yourself mucking around in the past?  Do you have a difficult time letting things go that you know you should let go?  Those feelings sometimes rise up and catch us when we least expect them.  Do you need to shed those leaves of hurt, failure, disappointment?  How do you do it?



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